Grassy knoll?

12xCHAMP&COUNTING · 2007-09-17 10:28 PM

So, the conspiracy theorist in me has had some time to consider the possible ways I managed to pick up some debris in my rear tire ending my day at "The Rock" after one run.

Pure bad luck is one possibility, but can we write this off without further analysis?????? I think not.

Perhaps I was doomed from the moment I passed through the non-pearly gates as I was the 13th racer to register Sunday morning so, you guessed it, my bike number for the day was lucky #13. Could I have been jinxed? Any rational person could not rule this out.

Maybe a fellow racer was trying to eliminate the competition. I have trouble believing this could be true assuming this person saw my one and only launch of the day. Had they seen me nearly hit the concrete barrier separating the two lanes after lighting up the rear tire, I'm sure they would have chosen another tire to molest.

My fourth and final theory involves a wide-spread conspiracy. This theory involves some underhanded actions by a member of this club, who is also a user of this forum, so I will not be using any USER NAMES.

After doing some research on google-earth, I've determined the number of grassy knolls located on "The Rock" to be no fewer than 6 and as many as 9 depending upon your definition of a knoll. Is this information relevant? Most likely not unless the conspirators employed a blow-gun, but my familiarity with conspiracy theories demands I begin mine with a grassy-knoll. Moving on then.

There are several reasons why I suspect, let's call him "Jeff", of foul play. First, the rule of "he who smelt it dealt it". I believe it's possible to apply this rule to this situation. Allow me to explain. Isn't it logical, when applying this rule, to assume that the person who "discovered" my tire was flat most likely caused it to become flat? Likely indeed. Huh, guess who noticed my little problem first? You guessed it. It was "Jeff".

Second, "Jeff" had many family members and friends in attendance on Sunday purportedly to cheer him on. Is it not possible, nay likely, that one or more of these co-conspirators aided "Jeff" in the completion of his horrific plan. Again, very likely.

Third, "Jeff" was the only club member to win a trophy proving he was out to win by any means necessary. Enough said.

My fourth and final piece of damning evidence against "Jeff" and his cohorts is his undeniable fear of me and his unrelenting desire to exact some form of revenge upon me. I should mention his fear is not without merit given our history. However, since I was in front of him in line and the fact that I'm not Chuck Norris, the likelihood of me turning my quarter-mile run into a 29,000 mile and running into him was highly improbable. As for revenge, it really is the ultimate motivator and I'll simply let it speak for itself.

Now that you have all of the FACTS, I would appreciate you taking a moment and choosing the scenario you deem most likely. I'm sure you will choose wisely.

Hind Tit · 2007-09-17 10:47 PM

Conspiracy theory #4B: You ran over something pointy.

Rand McNally · 2007-09-18 5:07 AM

(Fifth)You don't think having tires for sale at the event was a little suspicious? I tried my hardest to sell those things thought for sure you would bite so early in the morning with a tire failure?

practicecrasher · 2007-09-18 7:36 AM

WOOOOOW! :banghead:

eprissel · 2007-09-18 7:46 AM

Rand McNally wrote:

(Fifth)You don't think having tires for sale at the event was a little suspicious? I tried my hardest to sell those things thought for sure you would bite so early in the morning with a tire failure?

12xCHAMP&COUNTING · 2007-09-18 9:13 AM

So obvious. I'm ashamed I missed that. Your reluctance to sell just the rear might be what threw me off. He's sneaky boys and girls.....all kinds of sneaky.

eprissel · 2007-09-18 9:56 AM

12xCHAMP&COUNTING wrote:

So obvious. I'm ashamed I missed that. Your reluctance to sell just the rear might be what threw me off. He's sneaky boys and girls.....all kinds of sneaky.

Never underestimate the sneakiness!!!

9manchu · 2007-09-18 10:03 AM

I think you might be wrong about "Jeff" or I have the wrong person. I raced "Jeff" in the first round, and while I lost, I thought he raced his GSXR600 quite fairly and handled himself rather professionally. Although I thought the race should have been closer since I was .125 faster off the start and he was letting off at the end.

practicecrasher · 2007-09-18 11:02 AM

Dearest manchu, You should feel great...for that was a 750!

12xCHAMP&COUNTING · 2007-09-18 11:29 AM

You see what just happened here kids? "The sneaky" was underestimated. You might want to inspect that "600" a little closer next time you see "Jeff".

I'm surprised you beat him off the line since I'm sure his bike sounded like it had "launch control" which I'm not sure is legal at "The Rock". According to Freddie Spencer, three time world champion (contractual obligation, sorry), "launch control" aides a rider in "controlling the launch". Such insight. Freddie paints such wonderful word pictures.

On another note, I've acquired a great fondness for "".

eprissel · 2007-09-18 11:44 AM

On another note, I've acquired a great fondness for "".

and you use it quite well I might add...

Chippewa Valley Sportbike Club Forum

#1 2007-09-17 10:28 PM

Grassy knoll?

#2 2007-09-17 10:47 PM

Re: Grassy knoll?

#3 2007-09-18 5:07 AM

Re: Grassy knoll?

#4 2007-09-18 7:36 AM

Re: Grassy knoll?

#5 2007-09-18 7:46 AM

Re: Grassy knoll?

#6 2007-09-18 9:13 AM

Re: Grassy knoll?

#7 2007-09-18 9:56 AM

Re: Grassy knoll?

#8 2007-09-18 10:03 AM

Re: Grassy knoll?

#9 2007-09-18 11:02 AM

Re: Grassy knoll?

#10 2007-09-18 11:29 AM

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#11 2007-09-18 11:44 AM

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